By chance you met someone you haven’t seen for ages on the street, and the first thing she said after the usual airy fairy kisses,
‘You look fab! Have you lost weight?’
In other words, previously you were looking so so. Nothing worth mentioning or probably too kind to say you were pudgy before and you looked ugly. But what’s up with that? Am I unattractive when my bones aren’t sticking out?
‘I love your new hair cut! But you gotta do something about your white hair’
Right. When you love something about someone, nip the buts. Keep the positive and bite your tongue. More people these days are embracing the signs of aging or natural defects proudly, without feeling the urge to wipe them out. And let’s say you’re giving a compliment only to be nice, don’t. Just smile and keep your real thoughts to yourself.
Oh, and this as well:
‘She’s gorgeous! So lucky to have fair skin’.
All of us are born with different shades, that are not only made up of fair, medium and dark. Also having skin as white as snow, isn’t the only sign of beauty. However, if you want to go for whitening treatments, obviously nobody should be questioning your choice.
As for me, I tan easily. Sometimes I’m a latte and I can be a mocha the next minute. Though it doesn’t bother me, I do find it annoying when someone asked,
‘What happened to you? You’re darker now’.
We got to stop these shallow perceptions when commenting on someone’s appearance. Everybody’s beautiful in their own way and that is how it’s meant to be. The standard of beauty should remain highly subjective instead of prescriptive as dictated by others. Appreciate our unique differences and give sincere compliments. No buts and ifs, would be a good start.
‘You’re beautiful’. Full stop. Oh, yes you are 😍