A year has passed and here I am still at home wondering where the time has gone to. Some people said I wouldn’t last long, as boredom would kick in and off to work I’d go. Now, that has yet to happen! In fact there were days when I couldn’t even recall what my life was like previously. It felt like that big chunk of my adulthood was blanketed with hazy memories of my working days. Remarkably strange to think of it.
Apart from losing my memory, there is a lot more that I gained from giving up a comfortable dual income lifestyle, to being sufficient in surviving the rising cost of living. Let’s not dwell too much into the financial bit because it is expected knowing how the economic downturn is affecting the whole world. I’d love to say this too shall pass, but this time who knows what the future is like.
Right, what have I gained so far?
Peace and sanity. My whole being was in a bad state prior to the resignation, that I was proned to agitation, body aches, emotional distress, sudden bouts of crying and terrible mood swings. In public, at work and in front of family members and friends, I put on an act being the cheerful and chatty me. But my husband and kids saw what was happening to me and watched how fragile I became. Such a terrible feeling to be in a disturbed state without having much control of it. I’m actually quite a positive person (though I prefer to think of myself as a realist), thankfully, it didn’t take long to bounce back after the dark period. I’m sure God has His reasons and I’m ever so grateful for this lesson; now when something disturbs my inner peace, I know how to wiggle my way out.
A better parent. I may not be an award winning mum but this is the best of me that I’m offering to my kids. Sixty percent of the time, I’ll carry out the mindful parenting act e.g. listening before judging, reprimanding without punishing, showing consideration to immaturity while breathing calmly and purposefully. Unfortunately, humans are complex creatures, so there are times when using sarcasm instead of tact, nagging about homework or bathtime, lacking patience when they turned the house topsy turvy are definitely acceptable. That’s not all, the kids tend to share lots of interesting details about their days including some juicy secrets that no one else knows. Even my teenager thinks I’m worthy of being a part of his hard to understand world. We had a fair amount of disagreements and door slamming, but we made up quickly…and he was always the first to say sorry with a hug and a kiss!
Good breakfast and great company. During my working days I don’t do breakfast or lunch. My meal time was pretty much as and when needed until I was home for dinner. I’d rarely get the chance to catch up with friends including the ones at school. These days, whenever my obliging husband doesn’t have an early appoinment, we’ll have breakfast at our neighbourhood ‘kopitiam'(coffee shop) and usually our friends would be there, too. No shortage of adult conversation there and better still the topics are unrelated to work or stress inducing. Then there’s also the occasional breakfast with my best friend who is a SAHM, whose house is few blocks away and our kids are attending the same schools. She’s my reliable support system- the emergency pick up driver, carpool partner, school stop-over, babysitter, meal provider, an extra eye- that someone who understands this frustratingly wonderful world of a stay-at-home mum.
Discovering cheaters guide to a good life. I don’t have a live in helper (a very common Asian practice for an easier life at home) so I have to come up with the best shortcuts for cleaning, cooking and everything to do with housekeeping. After many trials and errors I managed to find simplified ways that work for me. I also go for multipurpose cleaning products that are reasonably good without having to spend too much. Housework is sweeter when you fret less and think less about it. Having lower expectation works as well because when the unexpected takes place e.g. dishes get washed by others, kids tidying up after making a mess, someone make the bed, the feeling you get is total bliss! Oh, can’t end this without mentioning cooking. Although I’m mostly a short order cook, my dishes are usually made from whatever can be found in the fridge and pantry. There are lots of fusion cuisine and made-up recipes along the way. Well, my way!
Blogging my thoughts. Words and writing are my passion for as long as I can remember. Journal writing and poems are my form of expression and therapy. When I was young I created my own dictionary filled up with all the bombastic words that I couldn’t even pronounced. My love for dictionaries and encyclopedias are undisputed, where I spent my time looking them up, as often as the youngsters these days get on the internet. I wanted to start blogging but never got to fit it in until now. Who would’ve known that by giving up a fulltime job, I finally got the chance to continue writing.
There may be less money in my savings and not much in my purse, but one thing for sure the riches that I gained are of greater value.